Six Feet

This car on a iris, I mean carona virus, is a strange thing.  We are still supposed to be sheltering in place and I am still curious about how turtles do this.  I asked Mr. Guy if he would take me to the park so that I could ask a turtle about just how turtles do shelter in place.  Mr. Guy said he could take me, but that we would have to practice “social distancing measures.”  I told Mr. Guy that I would be happy to do that if I had any idea what he was talking about.

Mr. Guy explained to mean that “social distancing” means that we have to stay six feet away from other people.  Six feet?  I don’t have six feet.  How will I know if I am to close?  Mr. Guy and The Lady don’t have six feet.  The only thing I know about that has six feet is a beetle.  So I figured that social distancing must mean that I have to stay a beetle’s length away from other people.  Beetle’s feet aren’t very big so I was sure I could do that.  I was a little worried at first.   If I had to stay six of Mr. Guy’s feet away or six of a big tall basketball player’s feet away I might be a little scared.  I’m just a little monster and I don’t like to get too far away from Mr. Guy and The Lady.  I told Mr. Guy that I thought that I could do well with social distancing, that I promised to stay a beetle’s length away from other people, even him!

Mr. Guy looked very confused.  “A beetle’s length away?” he said.  I explained to him that he had told me about staying six feet away from other people and the only thing that I knew about with six feet were beetles!  He told me that he was not talking about the six feet on a beetle.   He was talking about feet like on a ruler.  A ruler?  A ruler like a king?  I have met lots of people, but ( have never met a king.  And even if I had, I don’t think I would know how big their feet are!  This social distancing thing was getting way too complicated for this little blue and orange furry monster!  Maybe I didn’t really want to go to the park after all!

Mr. Guy tried again to explain to me about the six feet.  He told me that one foot is twelve inches, the length of the kind of ruler we use to draw straight lines, and that makes six rulers equal to six feet, or seventy-two inches.  I had to stay seventy-two inches away from people?!  I’m not sure that this little monster can count that high all by myself.  Mr. Guy finally told me not to worry.  He said that he knew how far six feet or seventy-two inches is; so, if he carried me in the park all I had to worry about was looking for a turtle  He would worry about proper social distancing.  This made me very happy!

The part of the park where we went was not crowded so no one had to worry about beetle feet, or kings feet, or seventy-two inches.  That was a relief!  Mr. Guy said that he would show me how to use his camera so that I could take a picture of my turtle friends…from six feet away…when I found them.

Once I knew which buttons to push, we were off to look for a turtle.

We looked…and looked…and looked.

Apparently turtles don’t shelter in place at the park.  Or maybe they too are confused about this six feet thing!